What is an Alpha Male?

It may be helpful to think about masculinity by asking yourself: what is an alpha male? What is the hyper example of masculinity? I think when you look at that definition—whatever it is for yourself—then you will realize what you aspire to be and how you can be your most masculine.

In my value system, an alpha male is like that gorilla who, when crossing the street with the gorilla tribe, makes sure that all the women, children, and smaller gorillas get across first. He blocks the road with his body as the rest of them make the crossing. An alpha male is an alpha male because he takes care of the tribe in times of war and famine. He eats last, and in peace time, he gets to eat first.

But that's not the goal. The goal is he is built to do his duty. He's built to take care. He's built to be the protector. He's built to do the right thing for the largest group of people, and he does it because it's in his nature. He doesn't do it for recompense. So you have to look deep inside your nature and find out: what do you want to take care of? What is more important than yourself?

What do you want to give to without any hope of return? Is it God? Is it children? Is it society? Is it family? Is it your nation? What is it that you care about more than you care about yourself that you will defend, that you will protect, that you will uphold, and that you will promote?

So, for example, today I would argue that people like Elon Musk, who even though they're businessmen and they make money—sure, they are trying to advance the tribe. They're trying to do what's best for the species. They're trying to get us off-planet. They're trying to get us into electric cars. They're trying to get us advanced AI.

If it is done in a mostly selfless way, where it's about taking care of people, then I think that is an alpha male. So that, to me, is masculinity. That's an expression of masculinity—it is showing that you're so strong that your shoulders are so broad that you can carry others with almost no effort. You can carry others as part of what you do, and the stronger you get, the more you carry.

So, the best way to find your masculinity is to ask yourself: what is my duty? What am I duty-bound to do? What do I want to do to a level where it involves taking care of something outside of myself? It has to be genuine, it has to be heartfelt, and it has to be done without hope of reward or recognition.

So it cannot be something that is given to you by society. It cannot be something that is inflicted upon you by books, by your parents, by movements, or by something that's going to make you popular with the people around you. In fact, if it's a true core value, it's something that you will do even if and when it makes you unpopular with the people around you.

Good luck with everything, and don't listen to other people. As a footnote, one thing that's become popular recently is men who attract other men by showing off jewelry and cars and how many girls they have. They've gotten pretty big in social media, but those are essentially perverted—almost a caricature of feminine behaviors—that they're doing to attract other women and to attract young men.

But no true alpha cares what car they drive, or how much jewelry they have, or how many girlfriends they have. They certainly don't use that as a way to signal their alpha. It signals exactly the opposite; it signals status-seeking, desperate attention-seeking behavior. So don't go down that route.