Why you can't stop checking your phone

If I were to ask you why you originally created your social media accounts, you might come up with something similar to, "Well, to keep up with friends and family and see what they're doing and stuff like that." And that's not a bad reason at all; in fact, it's quite an honorable sentiment.

But as society becomes more dependent on these technologies, there's an ever-growing problem. That is that our intended use for these social media applications and what our daily use actually looks like are often two completely different things. Many of us use social media and our smartphones compulsively. It's like a nervous tic; there's a certain need to check your phone all the time. It's constantly pulling your attention away from whatever's in front of you and back into your other online life.

I'm not gonna say this is ruining the world or anything like that. People are still showing up to work on time, and countries are still being run decently well, I guess. But the effects of this underlying itch are still measurable, and it's felt by pretty much anyone who owns a smartphone.

Maybe it's when you're mid-conversation with somebody, and things are going well, and you're having a good conversation, and then that itch starts to happen, and you just want to pull out your phone for no reason. Even if you're just swiping between pages, you're not really paying attention to what the person is saying. Or maybe it's when you're trying to write an email or an essay or an article and it's a little bit boring, and you find yourself drifting towards the new tab button. You just hit F enter and realize that you already checked Facebook like 45 seconds ago, and there were no notifications, but you still checked anyways.

And that’s exactly what I’m talking about. The weird thing is, this whole thing is an entirely new struggle; humanity has only been dealing with it for about nine years. Apple rolled out the original iPhone in 2007, but it didn't launch with any social media apps. It didn't even have an app store. Facebook didn't reach 500 million users until July 2010, a number which is now 2.3 billion, and Instagram wasn't even invented until later that year.

So the relationship between humanity and social media is still in its infancy, and we're just kind of stumbling around, hitting our heads on walls, trying to figure out the best way to reap the road to the usefulness of these apps without hurting ourselves and our well-being in the process.

So if you're somebody who looks at their phone way more often than you would like to admit, I've definitely been guilty of this. There's actually evidence to believe that it's not your fault, because most of these apps are designed from the ground up to be addictive. Behind the glimmering promise of increased human connection is basically a slot machine in your pocket where you pull a lever and fun stuff comes out.

These rewards are some of the most powerful and ancient rewards that can be exploited in the human brain: social validation. I’m not making all this up; this isn't some giant conspiracy. This is literally how these apps make money. They get paid by third-party companies who purchase ad space on their platform in the hopes that you, the user, interacts with it.

So the more time you spend on these apps, the more likely you are to click on or engage with these ads, and the more money these companies and these platforms make. These multi-billion dollar companies are built entirely by taking control of none of your money, none of your land, or your livestock, but of your attention. Because your attention is their currency.

And that's the underlying issue; we feel kind of helpless to compulsively use these apps, but they're kind of useful, so you sort of need them. They do enhance your life in some ways, and you do use them for useful things, but they're taking away from your life in other ways because of their addictive nature.

Thankfully, though, if you watch this channel at all, I don't make videos about why we're all screwed and can't do anything about it, because that's definitely not true. You can find a balance. You can maximize the benefits of social media while not falling prey to its addictive effects.

But unfortunately, you can't attain this sort of freedom by little quick tips and tricks. You know, "Don't use your phone as an alarm clock," "Only use your phone for one hour in the day." You really do need a paradigm shift. You need to adopt a new philosophy towards technology use.

One philosophy in particular is leading a sort of silent revolution, and it's helping people regain their focus and take back control over their lives. It's called digital minimalism. In his book by the same name, Cal Newport defines digital minimalism as a philosophy of technology use in which you focus your online time on a small number of carefully selected and optimized activities that strongly support the things you value and then happily miss out on everything else.

To better understand digital minimalism and how you can apply it to your life right now, one thing that was useful to me in understanding how digital minimalism works is to compare the philosophies of digital minimalism and digital maximalism.

Ok, so the digital minimalist doesn't mind missing out on a potential small benefit that a certain technology might give them if it has any risk of decreasing the quality of things that they already know to be of tremendous value to them, like their ability to focus.

Contrast this with the philosophy of the digital maximalist, who believes that any small potential benefit is worth downloading the app. If they think that Instagram will be a little bit fun for them, or they have any sort of impulsive reason to download it, they download it immediately. If some application claims to make you more productive or more connected or anything, they'll just download it without considering the larger picture of how that application's daily use will fit into their lives and whether they really need it.

So we've talked about the theory of digital minimalism, but I want to leave you guys with some practical wisdom as to how you can apply this directly right now in your lives.

So the number one thing you can do is a two-fold process. The first one is to vet every application you use. You do this by asking two questions: number one is, "What are the benefits of using this application?" and number two is, "Is this the best way to achieve these benefits?"

So let's take Instagram again for example. I like to rip on Instagram because I actually deleted it right after reading digital minimalism. So when I was deciding to delete it, my thought process went like this: what are the benefits of using this application? My perceived benefits that I was getting from Instagram probably were twofold. The first one was, like, I like to keep up with friends and family and see what they're up to. By seeing updates on baby pictures and engagements and stuff like that, I felt more connected to my friends' network.

The second benefit I experienced from Instagram was probably that it was just fun, I guess. It was mildly entertaining; when I wanted to break from something, I could check Instagram, and it gave me a little dopamine hit. So then I asked the second question: is this the best way to achieve those benefits?

And no, they weren't the best way to achieve those benefits. If staying up to date with my friends is important to me, then the best way to achieve that benefit is to call them or text them to set up a time to actually connect with them on a profound level. Maybe not even a profound level—just a genuine level—because Instagram is super superficial. Super superficial. You're not actually exchanging ideas and information and getting to know the person any better.

So in a way, Instagram wasn't offering me that perceived benefit that I thought I was getting from it to begin with. Secondly, there are way better ways that I can entertain myself that don't completely, you know, waste my time. If I want a dopamine hit, maybe I should go work out. You know, there are healthier ways that I can get this entertainment.

So for that reason, Instagram didn't really offer me much value that I couldn't get in other areas of my life, so I deleted it. Since I deleted it, that's one less thing that's pulling me away and sending me push notifications and tempting me to go waste my time on it. That way, I can use that gained time and redirect it towards the things that are important in my life.

And that's what digital minimalism is at its core: it's being intentional with why you use your apps that are on your phone and on your computer and figuring out why they exist in your life. For instance, I also deleted LinkedIn recently because my perceived benefit of having LinkedIn was that I was more available to collaborate within my professional network. I have only ever gotten one job opportunity from LinkedIn earlier on in my freelance video career, and that's it.

On a day-to-day basis, all it's doing is sending me push notifications and emails and stuff like that, telling me that people joined my network. And I'm like, "Oh, great." In my mind, I'm like, "This is more business opportunity. Potentially, I'm a well-connected guy." It's not worth it. It offers zero value.

But since I used to be a digital maximalist, I'm like, "Oh, there could be some potential value to having this app," and that's just dumb. So the second way that you can apply digital minimalism to your life right now is to optimize. Digital minimalism isn't all about just deleting every app and then just facing the consequences of the ones you don't delete.

Part of it is optimization. For instance, I can't really get away from Facebook. A good example of this is my Facebook group for this YouTube channel. It's doing very well. It's very helpful for people; it has over 3000 members, and that sort of accessibility for a group isn't really available on any other platform.

So I know this whole Facebook group thing is a useful thing for my YouTube channel. So how do I use Facebook and not get distracted by it? And that’s where optimization comes in. The main thing about Facebook that pretty much anyone would find distracting is the news feed. One thing that I did was I installed News Feed Eradicator; it's available for Firefox, Chrome, and I'm pretty sure Safari as well.

That replaces the home page, the news feed, with a motivational quote. I don't really read the quote, but it just gets rid of the news feed, and that's super helpful. The second thing I did was I deleted the Facebook app from my phone because that also has all these options for, you know, watching videos and playing games and stuff like that at the bottom. I don't need that crap.

I basically only need the messenger, and then when I really want to check in and, you know, allow people into the Facebook group, I'll physically type in Facebook and do that. And that's it. That's my entire Facebook experience. It's really stripped down, and it allows me to focus, and it has allowed me to view Facebook more as a tool for my business rather than a excuse to waste like 30 minutes watching these viral Facebook videos.

So those are just a few ways that you can apply digital minimalism to your life right now. It's a dense book; it's so rich with great knowledge, and it is probably one of the best books I've read in a long time in terms of changing my perspective. I think it's a must-read for anybody who uses technology on a daily basis, especially for people who are struggling to pull themselves away from their phone.

I'll put a link in the description where you can pick up your copy of the book. Couldn't recommend it enough. If you like this video, make sure to hit that like button because when you like it, YouTube recommends it to more people, and you know YouTube's algorithm sees it as a good video. I think this topic in particular is really important for people to see in today's day and age.

If you're lurking here, consider subscribing because I make videos like this on a regular basis, and hopefully, I can help you out when I randomly appear in your YouTube homepage. "Inaction is a slow death" t-shirts and hoodies are available now to buy; the link is in the description. Lots of people are buying and wrapping it, and it is a good reminder that, well, inaction is a slow death. It's a good daily reminder to take action rather than succumb to inaction and letting your soul decay.

That's all for today. Exciting things coming, guys! Can't wait to put out the next video. Thank you for watching, and we'll catch you in the next video.