Mr. Freeman, part 00

So here you are. You’ve laid your fears and doubts on the bonfire for me to burn the hell out of them. Now I step out into the center of this effin coliseum with a torch and a gas can in my hands. In front of me — a crowd of naked people backing up against the walls. I’m in the middle of things, as you can see, and in fact, I AM the thing. Oh, yes. I created myself! I’ve put it all under my control! You get what I mean?

It’s strange… I actually exist in the real world. I think, and I’m totally free of stereotypes. Oh, yeah. My world… has infinite possibilities without the daily junk food of television clichés, without the catchwords and slogans that are imposed by governments, or by the boob tube, or by your precious Internet. So here I am. Right here. And I’m real. You’re staring at your computer screen right now, but are you there?

Hey, hello?! And is there any way to prove that to me?! And so it appears… that you don’t exist… and I… do. I always have something to say, and what do you have to say? Think about it! “Gimme two brews and some chips” – mmm, how revolting! Or, “Honey, I need to use the bathroom” – while in fact you sit on the can and text your lover, or pardon me, jerk off.

Your whole entire life is nothing but lies, porn, domestic spats, Internet addiction, and mobile slavery. Well, am I wrong? Now tell me, have you ever done anything that’s actually out of the box? Never! And you want to know why you won’t be able to? Because it lies outside your comfort zone and you’re packed into like you’re packed inside a reinforced polypropylene bag. You are slabs of meat… squeezed between your daily routines and your work. “Next one in the line, please!” Or am I wrong?! Maybe I’m mistaken? Go ahead and correct me!

For instance, could you give away your cell phone to some random person? Huh? Now that’s a killer question! Could you go right now and reformat the hard drive on your computer? Isn’t it freaky? Did you shit yourself?! Do you know why you won’t do it? It’s because it would be like you’re committing suicide. You don’t exist without this stuff.

Have you ever done anything? Anything? Anything at all on your own? Have you ever just followed your own decision instead of waiting for the order, “Just do it!”, huh?!!!! So it looks like I am the real one and you are just an underdeveloped figment of someone’s imagination. You haven’t been drawn yet. You’re gonna have to try awfully hard if you want to prove that it’s the other way around and you can consider yourself a real living being!

And most importantly, this is not a game. This is a…