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The Courage To Be Disliked


3m read
·Nov 4, 2024

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I made my first video on this channel in July 2017 after months of going back and forth on whether or not I actually wanted to create a YouTube channel. What would people think? What if people hate the videos and tell me that I don't know what I'm talking about? Who am I to talk about these topics? These were the thoughts that flooded my head.

If you've ever been in a situation where you have to start something or give a presentation in front of a group of people, then I'm sure you've had a similar emotion. It's the fear of being judged—the fear that keeps us in chains and holds us bound from achieving our true potential.

To understand why we care so much about what others think about us, we have to go back to the beginning of human history. Man, like many other animals, evolved to be social. Our survival was dependent on close-knit communities, tribes, and clans. We would hunt together, make shelter, and protect one another from predators should they dare strike. Being together made us thrive.

So at the time, being cast out of the clan almost always meant death. Without the technologies we have today, making shelter, hunting, and protecting yourself from wildlife was almost impossible for one person to do alone. Sadly, even now that our society has evolved to a point where we no longer have to worry about predators, and we have the tools and resources to provide food, clothing, and shelter for ourselves, the need to be part of a group still has been maladapted to our current reality.

Then we were scared of being left out in the cold; today, we're scared of getting canceled on Twitter because of something we said, or getting insulted for repeating clothes on Instagram, or getting hate comments on your YouTube video of people telling you your voice is becoming redundant and boring. You see, this feeling of being ostracized has worsened woefully because of social media.

By creating likes and dislikes, we brought to light this need to feel validated and seen. In an instant, you can see just how many people support you—and that number can be addicting. It gets to the point where we stop saying what we really want to say and instead start saying the things we know will give us the most likes. Before you know it, you're posting certain thoughts, photos, and writing specific statements to get that attention and validation from others.

How many times have you seen your favorite influencers and creators online suddenly sell out, where it feels like they're no longer authentic, only doing or saying the things they know will please the algorithm? I made a video about Unit 731 and the despicable things the Japanese government did in the Second World War. However, because it was not advertiser-friendly content according to YouTube, the video didn't perform extremely well, and that's fine.

This is the kind of authorization and social conditioning that makes people fall in line and stop saying anything that might offend the people with money. It's like they tell you there's freedom of speech, but only when your microphone is turned off. Growing up, I always felt different. Of course, I had friends and wanted to be part of the social group, but I had questions about the universe that people just didn't like to discuss.

Who wants to talk about death and the afterlife on the school playground, after all? Because of that, I felt different from everyone else, like a piece of a puzzle but from another set, and so I grew up worried that everyone would look at me as weird and different. So, I tried my best to hide my existential dread to fit in like everyone else.

If you're watching this video right now, there's a high chance that you were also once a kid like me, who was so worried about being disliked that you shielded the real you just so you wouldn't be thought of as different. If you're still in that position, listen: stop caring so much about what other people think and start living your life authentically.

Yes, caring what others think is healthy; however, it becomes hurtful when we try to change ourselves just to be liked by others. You would enjoy your time on this floating rock far more if you choose to live your au...

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