Theater & Philosophy Rehabilitate Prisoners Better Than Harsh Sentences | Sabra Williams | Big Think
[Music] Good afternoon. [Music] Like Wendy, I grew up in a very abusive environment. It taught me to think that violence was a way of dealing with problems, getting your respect. It became normal to me. So I thought, with the cultural influences I got in the gangs, that it created a bad way of destructive behavior that led me to getting in a fight, and another person got hurt from another person, which was a self-defense situation.
But because I didn't testify, they ended up giving me 16 years to life in prison. So my mentality, even then, was I had to own up to it. And as much as I could understand it, I thought fighting was normal. I thought it was just gonna be a normal fight. In California, it's the felony murder rule, and you can be sentenced to life in prison under the ADA in the bedding.
So I had this pessimistic view living in prison, thinking that I'd never get out. I ended up getting a life sentence on top of another life sentence in maximum security housing, which allowed me to sit in my cell for eight hours a day, or sometimes even 12 hours a day, just studying philosophy, psychology, history, and languages.
I came across this passage from Nietzsche that said, "For thou has had a bad day, but still see that it worse. Evening does not overtake thee." And why he wrote that was when he entered into the German prisons, he seen all his fellow Germans just sitting around, not really trying to do anything with their lives.
So he talked about the ubermensch, which under my interpretation was to try to be the best person that you can be. Even during that time, I was studying the Bible, and when I came across the subject today where we're to speak of hope and optimism. I mean, hope to me, in my opinion, is one of the main components to a successful prayer.
Because I had hope, I became optimistic. I believed that I'd get out. I ended up getting out. I visualized a lot of things, and everything I visualized, everything I hoped for has come true. I was sitting in the audience, and having the philosopher stand here and talk about deep hope, I mean, to be in there telling 50 other lifers, "I'm not going to be dying in prison. I'm gonna end up getting out." That's deep hope, especially when it comes out of your mouth.
But I'm a strong believer in curses and blessings. Rather than curse my life, I would rather bless my life. [Applause] And I believe if you think it, you're gonna behave it. And if you behave it, it's gonna become an attitude. And because of that attitude, it allowed me not to think that I know it all.
Even though when I was young, I knew I didn't know nothing at all. I was uneducated. I want to live my life knowing that I don't know it all, and I want to learn. So when I came across the actors gang, I took it. I went with it. They even asked me to put makeup on, the men call it "man cake," and it's a humbling experience.
There are things that we live by, a motto in the actors gang, which is "We're a master of our thoughts, not a victim of our minds." I talked with my girlfriend about that all the time. When we're in discussions, I mean, it took a long time to become that person that I was.
It took around a good 10 years to become the person I was. But it took 22 years of my incarceration to make me the person that I am today. Transformation of this magnitude isn't a revolution, but an evolution. With the actors gang allowing me to witness anger, allowing me to witness fear, sadness, and happiness.
As you look in the video, happiness and anger are easy to accept in prison. But when it comes to fear, when it comes to sadness, we live this mighty small thing in prison, and it's looked down upon amongst men. But actually, in some cultures, it's also looked at as machismo. But the real machismo accepts those emotions.
We'll change the kids' diapers, we'll cook. So when it came to the actors gang allowing me to face fear, acknowledge fear, acknowledge sadness, it made me more humane. It made me more human. So when I have to cry, I cry, and that's processing those emotions. It's not allowing...