How to Navigate the Different Life Phases
But also you say, for example, the second phase, the part that I've been in tends to be one of the unhappier times of life. You think about how much you're worrying about your kids and whether they'll be okay, and all the struggles balancing work and family and stuff. Exactly, kind of helpful, right? You start to see, oh, it's not just me, it's everyone practically. Like, what you say, if you look, there's part of it that tracks.
Um, happiness— I studied, okay, what are the happiest, and how does happiness change? I won't take everybody through that, but you know, in the early years and then you get into the out just out of university or whatever, you're graduating, you know those are very happy years. In the um, that middle that you're referring to, when there's work-life balance and you're trying to juggle a lot, and you're trying to be successful, and you're struggling with yourself and you're struggling with your family.
Also, there can be times of disenchantment. The marriage isn't going exactly like you dreamed, or the job, okay, I'm not the superstar, because life is tough. You go and you encounter that middle part of your life, and those things are known, you know, that they happen. They're normal, almost, and you expect it. There are principles for how do you deal with each one of those better.
Then you come, and then I watch people have a difficult transition from one phase to the next phase. Because, you know, let's say you go from the second phase and whether we call it retirement or something, all of us, you know, you're in a habit. You're addicted—am I important? Do I matter? What is my status? All of these things that people then get, and they just don't yet know what that new phase is, and they become comfortable and enjoy that new phase.
I've mentored a lot of people who've gone— very, very successful people who've gone, okay, from being successful to then that new phase, and then understanding how to find joy. Because the happiest phase is really that phase which really almost comes on, typically around 60 or after 60. It actually, surprisingly, ironically, is the happiest phase in all of life, from enders across cultures typically.
Because, okay, you don't have the work-life balance, and amen, your parents are gone, your children are on their own, you have a freedom. You're not trying to prove yourself, and there are all the joys of all of those types of freedom if you approach it well. So, people understanding these things and understanding, you know, principles for dealing with the really beneficial.