What Kinectimals SHOULD Be Like -- Wackygamer
Um, you turned me on to this. I missed this game. What is this game? Uh, Kinectimals! Kinectimals! For those of you who didn't see the trailer, you can go check it out. It is a game where you have a virtual pet. There have been these games before, yeah, that called, um, not that you could stroke and pet and feel.
We are young—oh, he could be like, what is it called? But no, tell well. It's now the Kinect and the Kinectimals. The Kinect uses the Kinect to rub your TV screen, and then a baby tiger's gonna fall in love with you. This looks like the worst thing! I have a three-year-old niece; I know for a fact she wouldn't want to play this game. She'd be disappointed us no ID on the tops of his playlist. This game looks so dumb.
Here's, okay here's the thing: If they're going to have a game like this where you can have your own virtual pet, this is a time where you should be able to beat your virtual pet. You should be able to beat the out of that. And now we're going back to the Fable 3 thing, Nona smack. Oh yeah, I want to be able to beat up endangered species. I want to be able to pick out terrible snow tiger kittens—that's what I want to beat up! So tiger, because the one in the trailer is just a regular tiger, just a regular tiger.
I want you wanted—no, again, it's not exotic enough for right? Who hasn't beaten a tiger? So, would you want to like rape an aardvark? This is starting to sound at least mildly interesting. Like, it's all the responsibility and boredom of having a pet on your TV. It's—I don't get it. I don't—you don't have to like feed it or yeah, whatever. What do I? Okay, I also don't get to touch it.
Now you can touch it! No, not in real life. It's not like I feel any textures. And then the games—I get to play with it! I saw one of the games, really interesting game called balancing. Let's get on a balance here! I got news for you! I got news for you: Whoever are the jackasses who made this game, Tigers have perfect balance. They don't need help— they don't need a sister true from like a four-year-old, you know, little girl in her living room.
Number one. Number two, what kind of family was that in that commercial? It was a weird family because it's like a white woman with black kids and a Chinese kid. Here's the fucked up part about all the Microsoft commercials: they're in the same living room! They are always in the same—which is like, is this one house? Like 16? Is this a boarding house that we're filming in?
I was watching— I think that no, this does happen with every—you’re right. It's everyone. Because I always watch and I try to figure out like, who are these people’s relationships? Like, you know, who are these people? How do they know each other? You know? Because it's never like I can identify one or the other and be like, you know, uh, that's the father, that's the mother. You can't figure that out. It's horrible.
The best part is at the Dance Central promo trailer—not the one that we watched with the gameplay footage, but the one where it shows the family dancing. Oh my God! Have you seen this? See, this is exactly why than one— and there's a blonde mom. Mm-hmm. Mom's got a badonkadonk, and she's just rubbing it all over the kids’ faces as she's dancing, which is the best thing! But hey—oh love it! Kids emotionally scarring—a money sort of meds.
That's Microsoft's new thing! It's like, hey, let's ruin childhood! Well, the way they had it framed, they didn't show the kids sitting at the dining room table whacking it. Well, no! They just shot the kid who's getting ass hit into his face crying. Oh! You.