15 Ways to Get Mentally Stronger

Did you know that mentally tougher athletes consistently outperform their mentally weaker counterparts? A recent study has shown that roughly 80 percent of mentally tough athletes tend to achieve more or perform better. Now, it goes without saying that being mentally strong can help you do better in pretty much every aspect of life. Do you consider yourself to be a mentally strong person? How can you get mentally stronger? Well, today we're exploring exactly that. Here are 15 practical ways to get mentally stronger.

Welcome to A Lux.

Number one: Start the day by making your bed. The moment you wake up, make your bed. No scrolling on your phone for 20 minutes before finally rolling out of bed and leaving it a mess. Making your bed as soon as you wake up is a simple action that has simple outcomes. First, with the bed made, you can't get back into it; your bed is for sleeping, it's not for wasting the day away. Second, by making your bed, you've started the day with an easy win. You feel just a tiny bit more accomplished, and this gives you a little boost to your mental fortitude. If you can make your bed, why can't you do the next task of your day? Lastly, a messy environment leads to a cluttered mind. Knowing that your bed isn't made is just another distraction for your brain that keeps you from being your most productive.

Number two: List three positive things about your life right now. Say them out loud every day. Look, mental strength doesn't come from nowhere. To feel mentally strong, you have to learn to appreciate the good in your life. What brings you joy in life? For some, it could be their family; for others, just their pet. Perhaps you're reading a really good book right now. Maybe you recently got over an illness. It can be something small or something that means the world to you, but you have to find three positive things in your life and say them out loud. Just whispering is fine, but it's important to say them out loud so they become more real.

Number three: Stay focused on the present. Worry and anxiety are the Kryptonite of mental strength. While it's not possible to stop your brain from worrying on command, you could avoid fueling the fire. When we allow our brains to ruminate unguided, there's almost never a positive outcome. We torture ourselves with unhappy memories from the past and anxiety about the future. None of this is beneficial to our mental fortitude. Instead, make a conscious effort to live in the here and now as much as possible. Whenever you catch yourself lost in your thoughts, use your senses to bring yourself back to the present. Physically touch something in your surroundings or breathe deeply and think about what you can smell. Using our senses to interact with our surroundings can bring us out of the past or future and into the present where we need to be.

Number four: Pay attention to your inner monologue. Most all of us have an inner monologue that follows us through the day, narrating our thoughts and feelings as we go. But have you ever paid conscious attention to it? A mentally strong person has an inner monologue that speaks with self-assurance and positivity. What does your inner monologue say? If you catch it saying things like, "I don't have enough time to finish," or, "I'm not skilled enough to achieve that," well, it's time to start making some changes. Consciously transform these thoughts into, "I should properly focus so I can work faster," and, "What skills do I need to develop to achieve that?" Those are far more proactive and far more positive.

Number five: Take small steps to betterment. For example, let’s say you hate your job. You want to find a new job, but you feel overwhelmed with this huge task, and you're making no progress. Well, break this task into smaller tasks. The first thing you're going to need to do is to write a new CV or put together a portfolio, so focus on that first. Once that's done, you can think about the next step you need to take. Breaking tasks up like this into smaller steps feels so much less scary and much more manageable.

Number six: Don't let setbacks define you. Look, setbacks happen, okay? They're a part of life. Well, deep down, we all know this is true; we often deny this fact when a setback occurs to us. When faced with adversity, we become our harshest critics, don't we? "Nothing ever goes right for me. This wouldn't have happened to someone else." Put a stop to those thoughts immediately. If something can be done to mitigate the setback, start working on your solution. If nothing can be done, acknowledge the setback, think about what could have prevented it and what you can learn from this moving forward. Then move on. What's done is done; okay? You cannot alter the past. To get mentally stronger, you have to accept that setbacks happen and they will happen again, no matter what. Setbacks do not define you; it's your response to setbacks that is a true representation of your character.

Number seven: Celebrate success. Our brains are masters of focusing on our weaknesses, insecurities, and mistakes. They're less good at celebrating our wins in life. What did you do recently that went well? It could have been something momentous, or it could be something small. Did your colleague give you a compliment at work? Maybe you put a new bookshelf up in your bedroom. Give yourself a moment to appreciate your success, no matter how big or small. You did that, and you can succeed again. Whenever you catch yourself ruminating on something you wish you had done differently, instead direct your mind to think about what you got right recently.

Number eight: Learn how to say no. Imagine your mental strength as a cup. Your cup gets filled every day by tasks, engagement, and struggles. Doing laundry adds a drop to your cup; preparing for an important meeting adds a lot of drops. Adding too much to your cup will cause it to spill over. That's why it's important to monitor how much is being poured in. Doing people favors, taking on another work project, meeting an acquaintance for lunch—they can all quickly fill up your cup. When someone is trying to add to your cup, take stock of how much is already in there. Is there any room in your cup? If not, you need to say no. We often think we owe a detailed explanation as to why we can't do something for someone, but this isn't true. A simple story, "I've got too much going on right now," is totally sufficient. The more you say no, the easier it becomes.

Number nine: Become your own best friend. Mental strength must come from within. While social support networks can be invaluable, nothing beats self-reliance. When you rely on others, you open yourself up to hardship when that safety net is removed. We all know people that bounce from relationship to relationship or stay in a relationship that isn't healthy just so they don't have to face being alone, and maybe that person is you. This demonstrates a lack of self-reliance. A person who relies on others can never truly be mentally strong. Becoming comfortable being alone is one of life's hardest skills to learn, but once you've mastered it, you become unstoppable. The earlier in life you become self-reliant, the easier life becomes. If you rarely spend time alone, start seeking that time out. Go shopping alone, go to the movies alone, go to a restaurant or a café alone. Build up to spending longer and longer periods of time on your own. The ultimate test is going on a trip alone. If you never try, you'll never know the mental strength that can be gained from complete self-reliance.

Number ten: Strive for new social connections. Can we just talk about how self-reliance, aka being alone, is the key to getting mentally stronger? And now we're talking about making social connections? Like, what? Well, you see, the two are not mutually exclusive. You can be entirely self-reliant yet have many healthy relationships, including friends, family, and romantic partners. The key is to not rely on these connections for mental strength. You can lean on them from time to time, but you should ensure your mental strength is never dependent on anyone but yourself. Now, maybe you're thinking, "But I already have friends; why do I need new ones?" Well, making a new friend can give you a fresh perspective on your life. A new connection in your life opens up new possibilities and experiences. It gives you a mental boost too because you sought out and made that connection, and another person has chosen to spend their time with you. Seek healthy social connections; spend time with individuals with whom you share healthy investments and who can enrich your life.

Number eleven: Intentionally put yourself in a stressful situation. Do you usually try to avoid feeling stressed? Well, it's natural to avoid things we find unpleasant, but what if you could stop feeling stressed about the things that typically make you stressed? You can train your brain to become comfortable with situations that ordinarily will make you uncomfortable. With repeated exposure to stressful situations, your brain will become used to the feeling of stress and will be better equipped for handling it. The situation you put yourself in will depend on what typically stresses you out, but start small and work your way up. For example, compliment a stranger on something they're wearing or tell your waiter when something wasn't cooked to your expectations. Repeatedly pushing your boundaries will increase your capacity for mental discomfort and make you a mentally stronger person.

Number twelve: Practice at least one act of self-care daily. Now, you'll need this after the last one. While developing your capacity to handle discomfort is key to getting mentally stronger, a little bit of self-TLC is important too. You should practice self-care at least once a day, so ask yourself what never fails to make you feel relaxed and content. Perhaps you enjoy a long hot bath, catching up on a Netflix series, or reading. Knowing that you have this act of self-care to look forward to can give you a mental boost to take on the day's challenges.

Number thirteen: Meditation. Many people swear by meditation as a tool for mental strength. Meditation gives you mastery over your reactions and responses to situations that trigger your emotions. While emotions are a part of being human and we need them in order to drive our actions, we can become overwhelmed with our emotions. When we are overwhelmed with emotion, we elicit a reaction instead of a response. A reaction can often be illogical and wield negative consequences. Meditation increases your capacity for emotions; you can consistently respond to stimuli instead of reacting.

Number fourteen: Get physically stronger. Our mind and body are intrinsically linked. A weak body is not conducive to a strong mind. Exercise releases endorphins in our brains, so to put it simply, exercising makes you feel happy. Exercise also gives us a mental boost by making us feel accomplished and productive. Exercising for 30 minutes or more a day for three to five days a week can significantly improve depression or anxiety symptoms.

Number fifteen: Develop a routine. A routine saves us valuable time and mental resources. Every person's daily routine will look different. Some people will be less structured; some will be very structured. For example, Elon Musk plans his day out in five-minute intervals. It's important to know that it's fine to deviate from your routine; it's simply there to offer you some guidance and give you a loose structure to work with. Instead of needing to plan out your entire day, when you wake up, you already know the bare bones of what you're going to be doing that day. A routine stops us from wasting the day simply because we don't know what to do and from feeling overwhelmed by the prospect of the day ahead. Many successful people are very particular about their routines. Elon Musk, Jeff Bezos, and Angela Merkel are all people who have a daily routine, although their routines look vastly different from one another.

Now, if you want to be privy to what the routines of the world's rich and successful look like, while you're in luck, we've got a video of the 10 routines of highly successful people. Click here to watch.

Thanks for spending some time with us today, Alexa. We're so glad you did! If you found value in today's video, please give us a like, hit that bell icon to never miss an upload, and hey, don't forget to subscribe!