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The Stoic Guide To Overcoming The Desire To Escape Everything | STOICISM INSIGHTS


12m read
·Nov 4, 2024

Isn't it a bit strange that in this vast world we often stick to the same small corners where we were born? Here we are, on this huge spinning globe, and many of us never venture far from where our journey began. Think about it: how often do we find ourselves living, working, and eventually growing old in the same zip code where we were once kids playing in the local parks? It's like we're stitched into the very fabric of these places, bound by invisible threads to our origins, our family, and the people we've known all our lives.

But let's consider this. While staying close to our roots offers comfort and stability, it also begs the question: what are we missing out on by not exploring further? The Stoic philosophers would perhaps argue that by confining ourselves geographically, we might also be limiting our personal growth. They believed in developing self-awareness and personal wisdom, which often comes from facing new challenges and stepping out of our comfort zones.

In a world where moving from one place to another has never been easier, why do so many of us choose to stay put? Is it fear of the unknown, or is there a deeper, almost primal satisfaction in remaining where things feel familiar and safe? Yet, the same Stoic teachings remind us that external circumstances don't truly bind us; it's our perceptions and attachments that do. They urged us to question our assumptions about what makes us happy and secure, proposing instead that freedom comes from within.

Think about the implications of that philosophy in our modern life, in this age of connectivity, where you can live on one continent and work on another virtually. Aren't the boundaries that define our lives becoming more psychological than physical? Yet somehow, even with all the technologies and opportunities available to us, the pull of the familiar keeps a firm hold on us. As we dive into today's discussion, let's unravel this tug-of-war between the comfort of the known and the allure of the unknown.

Why do some of us feel that persistent itch to break free from our geographical cocoons and reinvent ourselves elsewhere? And what can we learn from those who do venture out? Do they discover new parts of themselves, or do they find that no matter where they go, they carry their old selves along? Join me as we explore these questions, looking at both the philosophical and the deeply personal aspects of choosing to stay or go.

Let's talk about what it means to really know ourselves and how our environments shape that knowledge. Whether you're someone who's moved around a lot or someone who's spent your entire life in one place, there's something in this exploration for everyone. If you appreciate the journey we're embarking on together in today's video, the simplest free favor you can do for us is to hit the subscribe button.

And please don't skip any part of the video to get the full depth of our exploration. You might know the feeling, the sudden urge to pack up your life and head somewhere new. It could be because of a messy personal situation, or maybe you're just fed up with your current surroundings. Sometimes you can't even pinpoint why you want to leave; it just feels like a deep, unexplained call to go.

Historically, humans were nomads roaming the earth, which might explain this lingering wanderlust, or maybe it's our way of shaking up the daily grind, seeking renewal in different skies and streets. This feeling isn't unique or new; it's almost a fundamental part of the human condition. Think about it: throughout history, humans have moved across continents driven by various motivations—survival, conquest, or the simple human curiosity about what lies beyond the horizon.

Today, though, our reasons might look a bit different. It could be the allure of better job prospects, the desire for a change of pace, or maybe just an escape from a life that feels too routine or painful. Each of these reasons has a story, a deeply personal narrative that involves overcoming fear and embracing change. And yet the Stoics would remind us to look inward before making such a leap. They believed that true change comes not from altering our surroundings but from changing our internal perceptions.

Why do we feel the need to flee? What are we hoping to find in a new place that we cannot cultivate in our current environment? These questions force us to confront the possibility that our discontent might not be tied to the place but to our internal state. Seneca famously wrote that while travel can offer a distraction, it cannot cure the disturbances of the mind. He suggests that peace comes from within, not from the landscapes around us.

Yet the impulse to leave is powerful and often feels like the only way forward. It's a decision that can seem to promise a fresh start, a blank slate where we can redraw the outlines of our lives. This yearning isn't just about escaping the physical place but about the hope of escaping an older version of ourselves. It's about the possibility of shedding past burdens and reinventing oneself.

The excitement of a new city, new faces, and new possibilities can be intoxicating, giving us a temporary belief that we can start over, free from the mistakes and regrets of the past. But as we delve deeper into this topic, let's keep the Stoic wisdom in mind: wherever you go, there you are. Changing your geography won't automatically change who you are or magically solve deep-seated issues.

This doesn't mean we shouldn't move or seek new experiences, but it does mean we should be clear about what such changes can and cannot do for us. As we explore this urge to leave everything behind, let's examine not just the external journey but the internal transformations that accompany—or don't accompany—such moves.

Let's pause and think: is heading to a new place really a cure-all? It's tempting to think we can leave our problems behind with a change of scenery. Yet, as the Stoics teach us, our issues usually have deeper roots. Changing locations might offer a temporary fix, but as Seneca said, you may travel far and wide, but your troubles will travel with you.

The dissatisfaction and unrest we feel often stem from within, not from the places we inhabit. We might crave the happiness we think new surroundings will bring, but true contentment comes from adjusting our inner perspectives, not our GPS coordinates. Diving deeper into the Stoic philosophy, Marcus Aurelius emphasized the importance of facing our challenges where we stand, not running away from them.

He proposed that our character develops not by finding new environments but by enduring and transforming within our current ones. When we think moving away will magically solve our problems, we might be overlooking the root causes: our attitudes, our habits, or our unresolved issues. This belief in geographical solutions to existential problems can lead us into a cycle of constant escape, never truly addressing the underlying issues.

Furthermore, the expectation that a new place will bring a new life can set us up for disappointment. When the novelty wears off and we find ourselves facing the same old patterns and challenges, the disillusionment can be profound. This is where Stoic wisdom really hits home. It teaches us resilience and the understanding that our external circumstances are not the primary creators of our happiness or our suffering. Rather, it's our responses to these circumstances that matter most.

Moreover, think about the energy and resources we invest in moving, the emotional toll of leaving behind friends and familiar comforts, and the challenge of adapting to a new place. These are non-trivial costs, and if we're making such significant changes based on the mistaken belief that location is the key to personal transformation, we might be setting ourselves up for a greater struggle.

But this isn't to say that we should never move or seek a change of scenery. Sometimes a new environment can indeed provide the fresh start we need. But it's crucial to go into such transitions with eyes wide open, understanding that our geographical cure should be part of a larger strategy for personal growth. It's about balance, recognizing when the change is genuinely beneficial and when it might just be a distraction from the more challenging work of self-reflection and self-improvement.

As we explore the idea of leaving everything behind, let's keep these Stoic insights in mind, using them to anchor our decisions, not just in the hope of what might be, but in the realistic understanding of what a change of scenery can and cannot provide. This approach doesn't diminish the excitement of a new adventure, but it enriches it, ensuring that our choices are grounded in wisdom rather than mere escapism.

What if the drive to leave isn't just about seeking happiness but about asserting our freedom? This perspective gives our desires a different shade. Philosophers like Simone de Beauvoir and Jean-Paul Sartre viewed freedom as a fundamental aspect of human existence. They argued that we have the power to redefine our lives free from the predetermined roles society places on us. Choosing to leave is a powerful declaration of autonomy.

It's about stepping out of preset paths and crafting our own narratives. It's not merely running away; it's moving towards a new self-defined existence. The Stoics too cherished freedom, but their conception was more about internal freedom—freedom from passions, disturbances, and the tyranny of external circumstances. Marcus Aurelius, for instance, often spoke of the freedom found in self-mastery and living in accordance with nature.

When we decide to leave, are we not in a sense attempting to master our own destinies by changing our surroundings to better fit our internal vision of how we want to live? This assertion of freedom can be incredibly empowering. It involves recognizing that while we may not control everything that happens to us, we always have a choice about where we go next, both geographically and in life.

Deciding to leave behind what's familiar can be a radical act of self-assertion. It says that our lives are our own to shape, and we are not irrevocably bound by our past or our current environment. But this pursuit of freedom through relocation also brings with it a responsibility. A responsibility to not just flee from discomfort but to actively create a life that reflects our values and aspirations.

It's about understanding that while changing locations can be part of our journey towards freedom, the real work is still done within. We must cultivate a mindset that seeks freedom not just from something but for something. It's about envisioning a life that aligns more closely with our ideals, and then taking the bold steps necessary to realize that vision.

In doing so, we live out another Stoic principle: the idea that true freedom comes from living in agreement with reason. By thoughtfully choosing our path and understanding the motivations behind our desire to leave, we align our actions with our rational understanding of what will truly benefit us. This is freedom in its highest form—not merely the ability to do as we please but the power to do what is genuinely good for us.

So as we contemplate leaving everything behind, let's view it not just as a flight from what's familiar but as a courageous step towards personal freedom. It's a gesture of liberation from the constraints of predetermined existence, an exercise in crafting our life's narrative, and a profound assertion of our capacity to shape our destinies.

In this way, our decision to leave becomes a reflection of our deepest values and a testament to our commitment to live freely and authentically. Perhaps this urge to leave is not about escaping but about embracing our true nature. Think about it: human history is filled with movements, explorations, and migrations. It's in our genes to seek new horizons, to explore and conquer new lands.

This inherent desire to push boundaries and discover new territories isn't just about survival or economic gain; it's a profound expression of our curiosity and our need to grow. When we heed the call to leave, we're tapping into a deep vein of human spirit that compels us to seek out new experiences and challenges. The Stoics believed that understanding our true nature was essential to living a good life.

They emphasized knowing oneself and living in harmony with that knowledge. When we feel the impulse to leave everything behind, it's worth asking: are we running from a situation, or are we moving towards a deeper understanding of ourselves? This introspection can transform the mere act of moving into a journey of self-discovery.

By stepping out of our comfort zones and into new environments, we're forced to confront aspects of ourselves that are easy to ignore in familiar settings. This exploration of our truest selves isn't just about geographical change; it's about testing our limits, facing our fears, and uncovering our potential. Each new place can act as a mirror, reflecting parts of our character that we've never seen or have long ignored.

Are we as adaptable, brave, or independent as we think? Moving and starting anew offers a unique opportunity to answer these questions, providing a setting where our true selves can emerge without the constraints of our past identities or expectations. Moreover, the Stoic practice of self-examination helps us to differentiate between what is genuinely in our control and what is not.

In new environments, this becomes crucial. We learn to distinguish between external changes and internal growth. While our surroundings can influence us, they do not define us. Our truest selves are defined by how we respond to the world around us, by our decisions, and by our commitment to live according to our values.

So as we talk about leaving everything behind, let's consider it as more than a physical journey. It's a spiritual and psychological voyage towards understanding who we truly are. It's about embracing the unknown not just outside but within ourselves. This journey of self-discovery can be as daunting as it is exhilarating.

As we navigate new landscapes, we also navigate the complexities of our inner landscapes, learning, growing, and perhaps finding aspects of ourselves we never knew existed. The desire to leave everything behind and start anew can be a pivotal chapter in our life story, one where we not only discover new horizons in the outer world but also explore the uncharted territories of our inner world.

This is where the true adventure lies—not in the miles traveled but in the incremental steps we take towards becoming more fully realized versions of ourselves. By engaging in this journey, we honor our most authentic desires and potentials, forging paths that resonate deeply with our core being.

As we wrap up today's discussion, let's reflect on the profound journey we've embarked on together. The desire to leave, to change our environment, to seek new experiences—it's a narrative as old as humanity itself. Yet, as we've explored, the true journey isn't just about crossing physical boundaries; it's about crossing the internal ones as well.

The Stoics remind us that wherever we go, we bring ourselves with us, and thus the most significant changes occur not in the scenery around us but within the landscapes of our minds. Embracing change, whether by changing our location or our perspective, challenges us to grow and adapt in ways that comfort and familiarity never can. It asks us to look deeply at who we are and who we can become.

The Stoic idea of focusing on our internal rather than external changes encourages us to cultivate resilience, wisdom, and a profound understanding of our true selves. So whether you're contemplating a major move or just thinking about how to improve your current situation, remember that the most important journey is the one that leads to a better understanding of yourself.

It's not just about finding a new place in the world but about finding a new peace within yourself where true contentment lies. Thank you for joining me on this exploration. If you found value in our journey today, consider subscribing for more discussions like this.

Let's keep seeking, questioning, and growing together. Remember, it's not just about where you are but who you are in the place you choose to be. Until next time, keep exploring, keep questioning, and as always, strive to live a life true to your best self.

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