JEFF VS. ADAM: Nerd Wars!
It's a nerd force! Oh good, what style are we doing it now? Alright, so welcome to Nerds War. There's a very special Nerds War. We didn't prep because I sliced my finger—[ __ ] oh um, so we're doing a Nerds War extreme! Adam vs. Jeff!
Said, I'm playing Adam, and I will be arguing in favor of Jeff. Exactly, here it goes! Let's do it!
In this corner, Adam McLaughlin. You know why Adam would win this fight?
Why's that? Because he just walks around being labeled a solo boring burn, bouncing people off with his intense fatness!
Job on Wookie! Exactly! You know, you'd think that would make a difference, but before Adam could pounce and bump you with his gut, the blinding light off of Jeff's forehead would blind Adam, leaving him open for a second attack.
Really? But you're noisy! But Jeff wouldn't even see Adam coming because Adam's in disguise!
I don't know if you know this, Adam has a superpower! He just blends in with homeless people. You'd just be walking down the street—Nelson!
Yeah, that's true! I've done that! And they'd be like, "But you think, sir, can I have a cigarette?"
But you see, right there, as soon as Adam jumped out and was about to attack, Jeff would interrupt him in the middle of his thought.
Oh, that's true! He does have quite the skill and divert him into a whole different subject about gay sex.
Speaking of gay sex, but you've forgotten Adam's secret ability: Uber gayness! He would just bend over and insert Jeff's stick right into his ass!
Ha ha ha ha! But before he could do it, Jeff would interrupt by placing his finger inside Adam's rectum!
That's true! Jeff does love to stick his finger in things!
It smells like victory for Jeff, and I think—I think Jeff won!
No, no! Alright, we did!