why is it so hard to live in the moment?

How much of life do you remember?

[Music]

Sam, you felt like you're present in the current moment. You're physically here, but our minds are always busy, always somewhere else. I heard this call and can't stop thinking about it: you're depressed because you're living in the past; you're anxious because you're living in the future. You're only at peace when you live in the present, but it's easier said than done. How can we actually live in the moment?

For that, first we need to understand the reason why our lives are slipping away from our hands. We often spend our time on autopilot, going through emotions without actively engaging with our surroundings. We let our minds wander, thinking about what happened yesterday or what we need to do tomorrow, that we lose sight of today.

We're constantly surrounded by distractions, making it difficult to focus on just one thing at a time. As a result, we're very rarely fully present in our lives. This is exactly why it feels like our lives are slipping away from our hands.

One of the biggest reasons we don't live in the present is because we never shut up. We constantly talk to ourselves. As philosopher Alan Watts puts it, "If you're talking all the time, we never hear what anyone else has to say." In the same way, if we're talking to ourselves all the time, we're never listening and never in a relationship with reality.

So how can you find peace in your busy mind? To live in the present moment, we need to practice mindfulness. Being mindful is almost like a muscle; the more you train it, the better you become at it. In an era full of distractions, this is a skill we all need to get.

And I'm going to be honest with you: this is probably my weakest area that I'm trying to improve with my ADHD brain. So in order to live in the moment, we need to practice mindfulness. Let me explain what mindfulness is. When you're mindful, you observe your thoughts and feelings from a distance without judging.

When you become mindful, according to the author Jade Dixit, you're able to be with your thoughts as they are—neither grasping at them nor pushing them away. Instead of letting your life go by without living it, you awaken into a richer experience. Mindful people are generally happier, more exuberant, and more secure.

They have higher self-esteem, decreased ego involvement, and are likely to have less chronic pain and increased immune systems. Practicing mindfulness was one of the areas I overlooked and didn't care about till this year. I was pushing myself harder and harder each day for a better future, but I realized that if I'm not living in the moment right now, when the future comes, I'll do the same thing.

I'll always chase the better future without ever tasting the right now, without ever tasting the present moment. I was trying to support my family financially, grow my business, make more money in any shape, this and that; and all this stress piled up, and I started actually to lose my hair. I lost a significant amount of weight without even trying.

But then I decided to reflect on this, and even though it sounds stupid, I matured and accepted the fact that I also need rest. No matter how strong, productive, or effective you are, everyone needs a good rest. I started practicing mindfulness here and there, and right now I'm trying to do it every day.

For that, I use the Aura. Aura is a new mindfulness and sleep app that won the Best of Apple Award and is used by over 7 million people. It's basically an all-in-one app for your well-being and sleep. It has thousands of meditations, stories, and so much more like CBT, life coaching, breath work, and spirituality.

I've been using their meditation guide to reduce stress, get better sleep, and improve focus. The difference between Aura and the other apps is that there is so much variety in personalization, so you can find a guide that fits perfectly for your needs. Finally, practicing mindfulness every day—or let's say I'm aiming to.

And if you want to get started for completely free on Aura's website, use my special link in the description. The first 500 people get a free trial and also a 20% exclusive discount. Join me on the mindfulness journey.

There is an Arabic saying that goes, "If you want to die, throw yourself in the ocean. You will find yourself fighting to survive." You don't want to kill yourself; you want something inside of you. It's easy to get caught up in our own lives, chasing after personal success and happiness.

However, it's equally important to focus on making others happy. By doing so, we can help bring purpose and meaning to our lives. I remember when my family was financially well-off, and I was making around 100 to 120k dollars per year. However, I was only trying to make money for myself, and after a short while, I started to feel unfulfilled.

Even though I was making more than I needed, I experienced burnout and felt unmotivated every day. Focusing solely on our happiness can leave us feeling unfulfilled and empty. When my uncle scammed us, and we ended up in huge debt, I decided to protect and provide for my family.

That's when I found the meaning of my life. It was no longer a personal goal, but a shared one. That's when I really started to push harder and further without feeling burned out or lacking motivation. We need to understand that we're part of a larger community, and our actions have an impact on the world around us.

I'm not saying to go and become a people pleaser; always please yourself first. But don't forget to please others, too. Even small acts of kindness or generosity can have a ripple effect that extends far beyond what we can see. When we choose to make the world a better place, even in small ways, we're contributing to a larger movement of compassion and positivity.

While helping to create a better society for ourselves and future generations, let's not underestimate the power of our actions, no matter how insignificant they might seem. By making others happy, we can bring a sense of purpose and meaning to our lives.

We can help make the world a better place one small act of kindness at a time. In order to live in the present moment, we need to give up the urge to sit and pick the ownership to who you are. We're all unique, with different strengths and weaknesses. Don't hide this uniqueness just to be like others.

In today's world of social media, it's easy to compare ourselves to others. We often change how we act or how we look to get more likes or comments. But we must remember that every choice we make should be based on what we believe in, not what others think.

Before you do something, ask yourself: do I really want to do this, or am I doing this because I want others to like me? If you're about to post a photo on Instagram, ask yourself if you really want to share that moment or if you're just trying to impress others. Just because others think something is cool doesn't mean you have to do it if it's not true to who you are.

For example, just because your friend is smoking next to you, don't smoke together if you're not a smoker. If there is a party at your office and it's not a must-go event, remember you have the choice. If you enjoy such events, then go have fun. But if you'd rather have a quiet night in with your family or friends, it's okay to say no to the party.

Living in the moment is about being true to ourselves. It's hard to understand what we truly value, but we have our whole life to figure that out. I know it's hard; I know it takes courage to stop trying to fit in and start being ourselves. But if you want to stop wasting your life, letting it slip away from your hands, we need to make sure that we live the way we want to live—a life that's worth fighting for every single day.

Setting high goals for yourself isn't about meeting societal expectations; it's about recognizing your potential and striving to fulfill it. Remember, you're capable of achieving far more than you might think. Set goals that hold personal meaning to you. They don't have to be milestones that impress others or targets set by society.

As long as these goals are meaningful to you and present a challenge, they're worth pursuing. Commit to working towards your goal every day. The journey towards them is just as important, if not more, than the achievement itself. It's this journey that fosters personal growth and instills a sense of fulfillment.

Humans thrive on the feeling of progress and improvement. It gives us purpose, sparks joy, and most importantly, it makes life worth living. For instance, if you have been overweight for most of your life and you wish to start caring for your body, set a goal to exercise regularly and eat healthier.

Sure, the journey will be challenging; it will test your discipline and willpower, but that's what makes it meaningful. For each step you take towards this goal, every moment of struggle is a testament to your resilience and determination.

Perhaps your marriage is on the rocks, and your goal might be to rebuild trust and intimacy with your partner. This could be one of the toughest things you will ever do because it will require your patience, effort, understanding, and countless conversations. Human relationships are hard, but the reward at the end—a loving and trusting relationship—will be worth every bit of the effort.

Your goals can span various facets of life; they could be related to your physical health, mental well-being, career, relationships, or personal interests. You decide what you want to work towards because it's your life.

It's crucial to remember you're the main character of your life, not a side character in someone else's. Your journey is unique; your dreams are valid, and your life is a canvas waiting to be painted with your own colors. I know it sounds so cheesy, but it's true. So go and design the life you wish to live. Don't live for someone's expectations. Bye.