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Why you should stop "improving" yourself


4m read
·Nov 8, 2024

Hello! Look at these cookie cutter suburban households that looks so pretty. Good fantastic evening! All right, let's film this video.

All right, okay, okay. So I shaved my head; I think it looks a lot better, to be honest. I was really postponing that. My hairline was like—well, I mean, you can see where my hairline is—and I had like a little bit of hair, kind of like, did I do this with? Then you turn my head to be all thin up here. Looks like I'm not trying to hide anything.

Anyways, so I'm about to go to the gym, but I just wanted to drop some insight on you guys. I've had this concept on my mind for quite a while, and I'm really passionate about it right now, so hopefully I can take this philosophy going forward. And that is the idea that self-improvement is not everything.

I used to spend so much time reading self-improvement books, subscribing to self-improvement YouTube channels, self-improvement subreddits, and it was stressful, to be honest with you. I was not fulfilled. I started to ask myself, how come I can spend so much time on self-improvement books and subreddits and videos yet still not be totally satisfied? Like, how come I don't have much of a social life? How come I'm not doing perfectly in school? Etc., etc.

I had to go through this. I'm like, "What gives? I'm pouring so much time into self-improvement, yet nothing is really changing. I'm not really much better off." Then I started to realize that I'm not really doing anything. Like, what? I'm reading self-improvement books—like, what am I doing, really? What is that accomplishing?

All these self-improvement books talk about how to do things better. But if all you're doing is reading the book instead of actually, like, reading it and then applying it by doing things, you're not better off at all. I'd read r/productivity; all these productivity tips would be up there: how to organize your Google Drive, how to, you know, make sure you're productive early in the morning. And I would—I’d read and read and read, but I wasn't really doing anything.

I did not take that advice and then apply it to real life. Self-improvement and productivity was my hobby. I wasn't actually improving the actual things in my life and living those things, and I wasn't actually being productive in those things. I was just obsessing over being productive and obsessing over self-improvement instead of just living.

So the point I'm trying to get at is: if self-improvement is your main hobby, honestly, get a better hobby. Don't ditch self-improvement altogether because you should always be reading new insights as to how to live your life better, more effectively, etc. But do other things, man!

Here's a good example. Okay, so these are the kinds of books that I'd buy when I was addicted to self-improvement: The 4-Hour Chef, Creativity, Deep Work, Thinking, Fast and Slow. Why am I? Why am I showing you the sides of the book? The Richest Man in Babylon, The Obstacle is the Way, The Checklist Manifesto, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a, 12 Rules for Life by Jordan Peterson—great book.

Think Like a Freak, How to Win Friends and Influence People, You Are a Badass. I started reading it, and I could not get past the introduction. All those books are like self-improvement books, productivity books, business books, startup books, instructional how-to books. And a lot of the time, I didn't even finish reading them. I just bought them because the act of buying them gave me like a dopamine rush and made me feel like, "Oh, if I buy this book, my life's gonna stop sucking."

But in reality, my life sucked because I wasn't taking care of those pillars. That's not a good—I wasn't actually learning how to enjoy going to the gym for the sake of going to the gym. I wasn't learning how to cook so that I could eat better and enjoy good food. I wasn't expanding my friends circle and becoming better at conversations and just enjoying the act of spending time with people.

All I was doing was reading about how to do all those things better. You don't win at this by reading this. You can read this to help you with these, but these are what it's all about. The Way of Kings by Brandon Sanderson—totally fictional medieval fantasy, 1200 pages. Actually, yeah, it's like 1200 pages long of nothing but made-up [ __ ] and I am enjoying the hell out of it.

This is helping me just enjoy the present moment. So, anyways, I'm gonna start making videos still about self-improvement for sure because it's like this is a self-improvement channel. But make sure to use the advice I give you in your actual life. Make sure to hang out with friends, go to the gym, eat good food, read good literature, listen to good music, expand your mind, work hard—not too hard—be smart, be charming, and enjoy life.

If you liked this video, hit that like button. If you disagree with everything I said, make sure to comment it instead of just hitting that dislike button because that's just not really helpful. I'm starting a Facebook group in which you can post your own productivity advice. You can listen to my productivity advice; we can help each other out, like each other's posts. The link is in the description.

It's a no-brainer to join that. If you have Facebook, join that right now. Become one of the first members—the pioneers of the self-improvement called Better Ideas Self-Improvement Hub—and let's get a movement going! Let's get a community building each other up in that community.

I definitely want to see posts completely unrelated to self-improvement sometimes. If you just made yourself a good-ass meal, post that in the group. If you have read Brandon Sanderson's The Way of Kings, post that in the group. Like, what other fiction books do you like? What self-improvement books do you like? Talk about your life.

Make sure to subscribe if you haven't subscribed already. Thanks for watching, and we'll catch you in the next video. [Music]

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