How your image can MAKE or BREAK you

What's up you guys, it's Graham here. So, how important is your image? Now, we all hear that a book shouldn't be judged by its cover, that we should get to know somebody first and give them a chance, but in reality, this rarely ever happens.

Now, whether or not you're for or against this, it's important to realize that people are making assumptions about you from the moment they see you. From how you dress, how you speak, how you look, it sucks, but it happens. Now, while we can all idealize about how bad this is and how you should change this, at least recognizing this can put you in a position to use this to your advantage.

This is kind of my approach to "can't beat them, join them," because this is human nature we're talking about here. Sometimes we are forced to make snap decisions just to process all the information that's thrown at us all the time. From seeing someone's social media pages to meeting them in person, we're constantly trying to size people up in relation to ourselves and how we compare to that person in order to figure out if this is a person we should listen to or not.

Oftentimes, the fastest way you can determine this is by appearances. So maybe I can wear something like this, or I can wear something like this, and this has a totally different perceived value than maybe something like this. All of a sudden, I look way different, and there's a new perceived value. If I wear something I'm, you know, it's kind of comfortable, and so let me change again. They're not uncomfortable.

So, let's talk about this. In an age where you're just bombarded with ads and people from every single direction, and you need to make a quick decision, you need to make a quick assumption about somebody. First impressions are important, especially if you're in sales or require face-to-face contact. Immediate snap decisions are made at the blink of an eye, and like I said, I believe this is just human nature.

From an evolutionary standpoint, this somewhat makes sense. You have to determine who you can trust and who's a threat very quickly; otherwise, you risk getting killed. First judgments are really the only way you can do that. Like, if you're seen with an exotic car, for instance, people automatically assume that you're more successful, and that immediately gives you more credibility.

With that, people are more likely to take you seriously and listen to you than if you didn't have that. Now, the person could be the exact same, no matter what type of car is behind them, but the perception of that person then changes dramatically.

Now, there are ways I've found to use this to your advantage, and one of the best ways to do this is just to match what you do. It really helps us to be congruent with who you are as a person and what you represent. Now, if something doesn't match up between the type of person you present yourself and the image that you have that goes along with that, people immediately get suspicious of it.

People quickly see the disconnect between what you're doing and your image, and if it doesn't add up, they hesitate. Because they feel like you're not living up to what you're presenting. Like, if you're selling a ten thousand dollar program about how to be successful and make millions and trillions of dollars, you can't be seen driving around an old beat-up like 1980s Honda and living in a studio apartment in Lancaster, because that doesn't add up with what you're selling and what your image is. People really like to see that you live what you preach.

Whereas, if you're like this app developer or tech guy, nobody's gonna bat an eye if you're wearing a hoodie and living with five roommates in a home in the Bay Area. It really just depends on the type of business, what you're representing, and the assumptions that people have about that.

Like in real estate, for example, if you're selling a five million dollar house, chances are it's not the best idea to pull up in a really old beat-up crushed-up dirty car because the image that you're presenting with that does not match the type of lifestyle at home that you're selling. And while you don't need a Ferrari or anything like that, you should at least try your best to be as congruent as possible with what you're doing.

Just start small. Like, my first car was a 1996 Ford Explorer with like a hundred and thirty thousand miles on it, and I was so embarrassed to pull up to showings in this car. I would park it like a block away and then walk to the house so people wouldn't see me get out of this car. Then, as soon as I saved up some money, I bought an $8,000 used Toyota Prius.

Now, this is back before Uber and every Uber driver had a Prius. Back in like 2008-2009, a lot of very wealthy people had Priuses; they would have the Ferraris or Lamborghinis. The type of car you have doesn't need to be flashy or luxurious or really expensive; it just needs to be clean and presentable, and no crazy weird accidents where it's crushed on one side of the car.

And that's it. I don't recommend you spend a lot of money on a car if you don't have to. But even how you dress can make a huge impact. And again, it doesn't need to be expensive designer clothing. But instead of wearing something that's oversized and wrinkled and doesn't fit, just make sure the clothing is well-fitted, that it's ironed, that it doesn't have any stains on it, and it's cleaned.

This is really what gets the highest ROI when it comes to clothing and being presentable. If you're wearing something that's dirty, oversized, it doesn't fit, people automatically just make judgments about you that you might be disorganized, not well put together. And if you're disorganized in appearance, are you disorganized in other parts of your life as well? People might also think that you don't pay close attention to detail if you tend to let yourself go.

So that's another thing to consider. My biggest recommendation when it comes to clothes is just get clothes that fit your physique, that are clean and ironed. That's it. And by the way, I've noticed the details make a huge difference, and one of the biggest ones that I really like are socks.

Get like crazy cool socks. It's something small like this that ends up making a huge impact, and that's really inexpensive to get some cool colorful looking socks. Trust me, people notice this. Even a fresh haircut and shave make a huge difference.

Some other things you can do: you can do minor things like just clip your nails and make sure there's not like dirt in your nails. Brush your teeth, maybe wear cologne. Little things like this end up making a huge difference, and oftentimes they're completely free. Good hygiene goes such a long way.

But the thing is, it's not just entirely physical of what people can see on the outside; the other half is attitude and really believing in what you do. Do you emulate what you are doing? If people check you out online, is everything adding up? Like, I hope you don't see pictures of me doing keg stands and stuff like that because that's not an image that I'm trying to go for.

There's nothing wrong with that, but at the same time, I try to craft my image around not doing keg stands and not doing stupid things and posting them online for everybody to see. So if you're doing any of these things, it's not bad or anything like that; just don't do anything that would potentially ruin your reputation because, again, this is the image that you're crafting of yourself.

So to go about this, I highly recommend figuring out what you want and then tailoring your image to represent that type of person you want to become. Dress for success, as they say. That's how you want, and you will become it.

And again, it doesn't need to be something superficial. I'm a short guy, for instance, but I don't let that stop me in other areas and make excuses for myself unless I can't reach, you know, the top thing at the grocery store. I need some help on that.

But beyond that, don't let superficial things hold you back from anything because the reality is that anything superficial that you don't have control over should not be something that will hold you back. Anything like that is really just a mind game, and those mind games hold you back way more than anything superficial you have going on that you can't change about yourself.

Focus really on what you have direct control over, and that's how you dress and the clothes that you buy, and how well that fits you, and the image that you give off by that. Your hygiene, brushing your teeth, making sure you have a good haircut, working on having good body language, having good posture, speaking with confidence and your image is gonna be matching the person that you want to be.

Anything that you're lacking, by the way, work on it. Work on getting better at speaking if that's your issue; work at being more assertive if that's your issue; work at getting over some of your fears if those are the ones that are holding you back. You're not getting what you want; you need to work on yourself to become that person who can get that.

At least understand that image can play a role in how you are perceived and how seriously you're taken. I mean, the stupid reality is that, you know, if I had a McLaren P1 instead of buying all this real estate, its bottom McLaren P1, chances are people would think I'm way more successful than, you know, me talking about things you guys really haven't seen and having stuff tied up in real estate and stuff like that.

But that's the reality of the situation. That's the reality that a lot of us go through, and that's the reality of just life in general. To a certain extent, I think it's important to play into that sometimes. People are going to make quick decisions and assumptions about you based off very superficial things. I believe that just by understanding this, you're able to use this to your advantage and at least play this up in your favor.

I'm not advocating going and spending a ton of money on stuff you don't need to spend money on; it's often as simple as just making very small changes that are gonna go a long way. Like I said, just be congruent with the type of person that you are and what you're selling.

Especially in real estate, this is one of the big ones. Especially if you're selling multimillion-dollar estates, you don't want to pull up looking like a slob with McDonald's wrappers all throughout the car, and your car hasn't been cleaned in like months. It's dirty and it's falling apart and here you are at a 10 million dollar listing showing the celebrity clients at home, and your image doesn't match the type of lifestyle you're selling.

I think this applies to many careers and especially careers in sales, where people are gonna make assumptions about you really quick. At least use this to your benefit.

So, as always, you guys, thank you so much for watching. I really appreciate it. Now, if you haven't already, make sure to smash that subscribe button and also hit the notification bell. Be a part of the notification squad so YouTube updates you when I post videos.

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