Arrogance & Pride in Stoicism | Q&A #4 | June 2019

Hello everyone, welcome to the QA of June 2019. How are you all doing? Man, oh man, it's been so hot the last few days in the Netherlands! I understand why they take afternoon naps in some warmer countries, because when it's above 30 degrees outside, you can't really do anything—at least not here.

Nevertheless, I've been looking at the comments again and selected a few nice ones for this month's Q&A, which is the fourth edition already. In this video, I will talk about pride and arrogance in stoicism. First of all, thank you Temple for becoming a supporter on Patreon; very much appreciate it. I want to dedicate this video to a question from one of my Patreon supporters named Huang Saman about pride and arrogance in stoicism. It was quite a detailed question and enough food for thought to dedicate one video to.

Here's the question and a quote: "I'm very fond of this philosophy but I also consider you military value. Because of this, I think— and I include myself— stoicism can be bound to arrogance. I'm sure you know what I mean. Stay away from the common or vulgar topics. Determining someone that insults you is out of ignorance. Not getting offended by disloyalty or ill-will, you are better than them. It's like there's a very thin line between virtuosity and arrogance, as this way of thinking often compares itself to the rest of the world, encouraging feelings of superiority and to accept ignorance or imperfections in others. Who am I to be that condescending?

I feel myself often trapped in these thoughts. I often don't consider a woman as worthy of me because of her beliefs, her way of thinking, her interests, and I hate doing that. It pulls me away from most people. So I guess the first question of mine is: how can you find a good balance between potential arrogance hidden in stoicism and humility in the contemporary era?"

First of all, Huang, I want to thank you for this amazing question about the phenomenon that turns almost every spiritual, philosophical, or religious pursuit. The question is challenging and I hope that my answer can live up to the profundity of it.

Now, the first thing that comes to mind when I reach a question is something called spiritual pride, which we see happen very often. It's the classical example of someone embarking on a spiritual journey and feels superior to others as a consequence. For example, we see a contempt ingrained within religious communities towards the non-believers that are seen as merely lost souls, to actual wicked people that we should stay away from as far as we can.

Also, we see spiritual pride among practitioners towards one another, which transforms what could be a spiritual experience into a game of one-upmanship. These people say, "Look, I'm more enlightened than you. I'm more God-loving than you. I'm more grateful than you. I'm meditating more than you." In the same way, Stoics could say to each other, "I'm more stoic than you." If one lives his or her spiritual life in that way, yes, I think there's a degree of arrogance involved.

It's just the ego telling a story and makes the practice of spirituality nothing different from being, let's say, a buffed bodybuilder that takes pride in the ability to bench more in a weight room than others, or taking pride in having a more expensive car than your neighbors. I'm not saying that this is wrong; it's just that I don't think that this is what any spiritual practice is about.

Nonetheless, people tend to make everything a competition or at least a way to distinguish themselves from others and feel better than others. Again, it's the ego at work. The ego is always competing with other egos and only looks at the world as better or worse, inferior or superior, etc. It's a never-ending cycle.

I think that a philosophy like stoicism could actually be a vessel to weaken the ego and be more compassionate and humble. Marcus Aurelius, for example, if you read the Meditations, you will see that he is a very humble man, especially for an emperor. He selflessly sacrifices himself for the greater good and actually wants us to not be prideful but virtuous instead.

I've got this part from a website called The Daily...