15 Steps to Reinvent Yourself and Start Over

Life is too short to be stuck in a life you don't like. So, what is your best option? By the end of this video, you'll have the game plan you've been looking for.

Hello elixers, we're so glad to have you with us for a very special Sunday motivational video. For some of you, this will be the most important thing you watch. Your ability to live a life you're proud of depends on your understanding of the present and how it connects with your future. More often than not, the present you're living right now will not lead to the future you desire. We're here to help you fix that.

This is why today we're looking at 15 steps to reinvent yourself and start over. Let's get started!

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Step one: decide you want to change. Every change starts with realizing the long-term effects of the way you're currently living. Picture yourself 10 to 15 years into the future, following the trajectory your life is on right now. Are you happy? Are you fulfilled? If the image you're seeing isn't a pleasant one, you should wake up. Your life will not change unless you change. This moment right now might be your best option to make a decision to alter your future, but it has to be a decision.

Decision is a very special word. Throughout time, it evolved from the family tree of incision, which means to cut something up. That's quite literally what you do when you make a decision: you cut your options down. Too many times, people become complacent and their regret builds up with time, resulting in them becoming toxic parts of society. Everyone wishes they would have done more, been more, but when the time was right to make the change, they postponed it for a hypothetical tomorrow that never came. Insanity is knowing the outcome of an action and still expecting different results. If what you're doing now won't get you to where you need to be, it's time to wake up and decide if you're going to settle for this or give it your all and try to change. And we say give it your all because it will take everything you are now to build who you'll become.

Step two: make a six-month plan. This is where your attitude shifts from a desire to a plan. A goal without a plan is just a wish, and unless you believe in magic genies granting wishes, you're not gonna get very far. Six months is more than enough time to get started. Quite literally, six months from this very moment, you could be a new person! To simplify it, it's a three-step process:

1. Define it: This is where you create a vision for your new life. Who is this person you'll become? What do they do? What do they eat? Where do they live? Who do they spend time with? What does their life look like? Write your answers down as specifically as you can. People even print photos of the answers and stick them up on walls and call them vision boards. These help you to better understand your new reality.

2. Break it down: Figure out what you're taking with you in your new life and what you'll leave behind. This is the very reason most people never get anything done—they don't break it down into actionable steps. What do I need to do to get started? What is the minimum skill that will get my foot through the door? How much will it cost for me to move or change? What tools do I need? How many interviews will you need to get a new job? How much money do I need to save up to give myself a shot at setting in? The questions you ask yourself when you break down your new life will be specific to your situation, so try to attack the issue from every angle. The more prepared you are, the higher the chances of your success.

At this point, you're just looking at getting the ball rolling. It definitely helps to have a long-term plan, but at this stage, your focus should be on the immediate steps.

3. Commit money and effort to it: Yep, this is where it gets real. This is where you start investing in your new life. Looking to move to a new country? You start taking language lessons. Yes, pay for that tutor; pay for that immigration lawyer. This is where you buy the plane ticket or pay for the first few months' rent in a new life. To keep this metaphor going, a goal without a deadline is nothing but a wish. Plant that flag into a specific date in the future, because once you do, it's a race against the clock to get yourself ready, and it'll push you to deliver.

Now that you have a plan written down and have planted your anchor into a new future, it's time to get to work.

Step three: start building your new skill set. Building a new you will take effort, and effort means you'll have to do things that are uncomfortable for you. Things that will seem hard, complex, difficult to understand and implement at first. Building a new skill set is hard; accept it and get to work. This is where you practice every single day. You're doing this because your new life depends on this exact period of time. You need to get yourself in position, in shape like an athlete getting ready to compete. Do not be afraid to start slow or feel dumb for starting with the fundamentals. Embarrassment is the cost of entry. This is the foundation everything else will be built on, so you need to build quickly from the ground up.

We strongly recommend you make a schedule for yourself. If you have this super strong goal for yourself, committing to a schedule will not be as hard as you think, because the outcome will keep you pushing forward when otherwise you would normally quit. Constantly ask yourself, "What if this new thing I'm actually doing works out for me?" Most people underestimate the results six months of focus and discipline can bring into one's life.

Step four: make one connection from the new world you'll live in and adjust the plan accordingly. This is a hack we've used to pick up speed quickly. Find someone who's willing to teach you the ropes, or if not, find someone who's doing it and emulate the out of them. This requires humility and a lot of detective work. Put the same energy you put into stalking your ex into this, and you'll see results in no time. If you find someone, ask this individual to fill in your blanks about what it takes to make the change. They will usually provide highly valuable insights from the ground level, and they will more often than not even provide guidance and support once you get there. Just don't be too much of a pain in the behind. People will gladly give advice or tell you their story. This is one of those times where external insights could make or break your efforts.

Also, do not hesitate to get a second opinion. We are all different by nature, so what is hard for one person could turn out to be easy for you.

Step five: understand that the door is open and it will remain that way. This is one of the biggest secrets in life, and we want you to pay very close attention to it because it'll alter the way you think about life from this point forward. You're here because you want to escape the life you're currently living, right? Well, the secret is this: this is your default life. As shitty as it may be, you can always come back to it if things don't work out in 12 to 18 months from now. So, you have nothing to lose apart from a few months and maybe a bit of money. People are too scared to fail without realizing that this current lifestyle is your bottom floor. If you're smart and willing to put in the effort, your life can only improve. The door is open to walk out anytime you feel ready, and if you don't like what you find there, you can always walk back in. It might not be the same job, the same rented apartment, but on a large enough scale, it won't make any difference whatsoever. Time will pass no matter if you make the choice or not. It's up to you where you find yourself 12 months from now.

If the first five elements on this list got you ready and prepared, it's now time to make the change a reality.

Step six: move and survive. You can skydive or cliff jump numerous times in your life. No matter how much you prepare or pump yourself up before you climb, there's a moment where time dilutes in your life. It's the one where for a fraction of a second you look beyond the edge. This is a moment where you'll need to recognize resistance. Most of us have two lives: the life we live and the unlived life within us. Between the two stands resistance, according to Stephen Pressfield. So, if you look beyond the edge into the unlived life, that's where your body goes numb, your blood starts flowing, and your brain goes into panic mode. Are you really sure you want to do this? And then you jump. Then you get out the other way. You dive, you land, you get up with this feeling, this thrill of excitement like you could take on the world. But that very moment is when you make the choice to jump.

We recommend you jump. If you know intellectually that this is a good move for you, force your body to follow through and commit to the move. Once you're there, your main focus becomes survival. For the first few weeks, all you have to do is survive. Figure out where to live, how to sustain yourself, and cover your basics. You're not looking for comfort yet, and you're not comparing this new standard of living with your old one. In the first few weeks, it usually sucks, but look at you! You're actually doing it. That thing you said for years you were going to do, that people said you would never do, you're doing it. Focus on surviving first.

Step seven: push through the feeling of loneliness and chaos. Whenever growth happens, the body doesn't feel right, the same way it does when you're going to the gym. It hurts. Your mind does the same thing; it starts to panic, to doubt itself, to reconsider all the choices you've made because of the state of uncertainty you find yourself in. Your evolutionary genes prioritize survival through complacency overgrowth. That's why your gut feeling is telling you to go back to where it was unpleasant but familiar. At least it's an evil that you know. But in the same way, those who ventured out into the wilderness found new treasures, and so will you if you stick with the game plan you've made for yourself.

This new place feels lonely because it's new. It feels chaotic because it's new. You'll feel small because the unknown around you is so vast. At this stage, you probably don't know anybody, but this is normal. You get to know more of the unknown once you begin to settle into your new role. This feeling of familiarity comes with time, and as you embrace your new environment, it will also embrace you. This is a crucial phase in your change schedule. You already took the leap of faith; you're running this new race that you just started. You simply can't quit this early.

Step eight: start building new life routines. When you're starting over, you need a routine in your life to make sense of it all. If we're talking about moving to a new geography, find a coffee shop near you to get your coffee or tea there consistently. Let the barista know you're new in town and just move there. People love welcoming others into their bubble. If you just switched jobs, talk to the people you'll most likely see every day on your route. If you don't have connection opportunities through work, these will come naturally as you build other routines. Join a gym, a theater group, a startup incubator, volunteer regularly with an NGO, or anything related to your passions. Any regular activity that benefits you or the community should be embraced. These will ground you and give the new environment purpose. Plus, it's a great way to make friends.

By the way, for those of you who are thinking we're only talking about physical relocation, that's not the case. Every time you reinvent yourself by shifting careers, shifting lifestyles, or making any type of change, this step-by-step process will remain the same. At this point, you're already beyond the stage of survival; you're actively building purpose and making this your new home.

Step nine: find your first anchor of happiness, then build around it. Give it enough time and effort, and something eventually will click. You'll meet someone you're interested in romantically, your new business will take off, you'll get a promotion, or make a great friend. This event is your first anchor into the new lifestyle. It officially means that you're here to slay, because you're thriving in the new environment. Because of this early success, other bubbles will open up. The partner will introduce you to their friends, or the startup will get a new exciting investor on board. The promotion will come with extensive benefits and so on. Suddenly, your new life begins to make so much sense, and you're experiencing a feeling of euphoria. Everything you wanted is actually happening, and now you look back on the decision to venture out as the best thing you've ever done in life. This first anchor validates your ability to thrive, and you're ready to call this your new home.

Step ten: set big goals for your new life. You didn't put all this effort into your evolution just to settle for just a bit better. If this is already rolling in your favor, you might as well swing for the fences. This is the part where you go from "Will this work?" to "How big can I get it to be?" You begin by setting the right goals for yourself. Maybe you were working at a company you didn't like and decided to give it a shot as a freelancer. What if you could only work six months a year and make enough money to travel the world the other six? That's an amazing goal to have, right? Or maybe you just published your first book and made yourself some money. What if your next book sold 100 times the first one, and you'll end up making a living as a writer, and you can quit your job? Another amazing goal to have. Most people look to reinvent themselves because they're not happy with their initial reality. Some of these people are too scared to try and settle for misery, and some have to try a couple of times until they figure out what they actually want. But those who do make the jump never look back on their decision. You know, if you're gonna dream anyway, you might as well dream big. Not only are you reinventing yourself, but what if this new life gave you a shot at having everything you've ever wanted from life?

In the words of Marshall Mathers: would you capture it or let it slip? Setting the right goals and strategically planning for success is one of those things that fascinated us throughout time. Through trial and error, we've perfected a way to set and achieve goals. Everything we've learned in the past ten years is being edited into a premium product that's coming in the next couple of weeks called Goal Mastery. A single click in your life can set up a domino effect that changes your life completely, and that is what Goal Mastery is— that specific edge that makes the difference. The waiting list is available at alux.com/goals. We can't wait for you to put it into practice and to see what kind of improvements you get in the process of reinventing yourself.

Step eleven: build your social circle. With your life already picking up momentum and big goals on the horizon, it's time to add some spice to it. Friends make everything better, and the right ones can transform any experience into a positive one. They're your safety net. They open doors for you, they take you out of your comfort zone, and round you out as a human being. Your life is boring because you have boring friends. The thing is, if you want to have cool friends, you should become cool yourself. In the process, you'll make those friends. Engage with different individuals, different points of view, different cultures. Learn about people. Go to events when you can. Use the 24-hour rule: if you meet someone at a social event, follow up with them within the next 24 hours. This allows you to keep that momentum going.

Step twelve: pay attention to not repeat the patterns of the previous life. One of the biggest mistakes most people make is to simply change location without changing behavior. If everyone you meet is an a-hole, there are two options here: you're probably the a-hole, or you're in the wrong place. Here's the thing: if you change places and everyone is still an a-hole, that leaves only one option left — one common denominator. You can't expect the way you interpret life to change just because you changed your environment. You are still you. The process of reinventing oneself implies a shift in behavior or the lens through which you process the world. It's easy to fall back into the same habits that made you miserable in the first place. Whenever you do it, raise a red flag and remember why you left your old life behind.

Step thirteen: prove to yourself that you can live off this new lifestyle long-term. This is where you find comfort; the new reality becomes your long-term reality. This is who you are now. By this point, you have a system in place that is sustainable and predictable, but this time it isn't making you lose your mind with regret. Time goes by and your life flourishes because of it. In other words, it just feels right. Now all you have to do is set everything up in place so you can do this for the foreseeable future. A special thing happens at this point: the return is increasing because you enjoy doing it more. You're more productive, editing videos or writing your books or painting your paintings or running your business than you were in your past reality. This additional input exponentially impacts the results. It might not seem like much early on when you're struggling, but once you cross a certain sustainability threshold, things begin to accelerate.

The sustainability threshold is the key to unlocking this new lifestyle. Our first goal when we were at the beginning was to make enough money from our digital platform so we don't have to get a job. Then it became to support our family and the families of the people who worked for us. Since then, things have snowballed into this incredible enterprise, which we are once again on the brink of reinventing. Take this as a small teaser, but we have something big planned up ahead.

Step fourteen: incrementally improve elements around you. With the reinvention process completed, it's time to upgrade the things that allow for upgrades. Slowly start making your life better, one sector at a time. Improve the quality of your relations, improve the quality of the food you eat, improve the comfort of your home, and improve the ideas you expose yourself to. Because of this, newer and better versions of you come to fruition. If the old you was version 1.0 and the reinvented one is 2.0, think of these small incremental improvements as 2.1 and 2.2 and so on. We as humans are not designed to be stagnant. You were not born to work yourself to death in order to pay your bills, have children who will do the same, and then die off. We are excited about creating the future, putting people on other planets, connecting the world through technology, curing diseases, and creating new foods. It's in our DNA to perpetually improve.

Step fifteen: achieve the new version of success. The last item on our list of 15 steps to reinvent yourself and start over goes beyond what you initially set out to do. You see, when you begin this journey, you had a vague idea of who you wanted to become—the version 2.0 we mentioned earlier—but in the middle of all of this, you learned more about yourself. You developed, evolved, and now that 2.0 has suffered some changes, the new complex being you are today has different expectations based on what the 2.0 reality was like. Through small iterations and opening up to more inputs, you're ready for a new mature phase; that's where 3.0 you comes into play. Everything you experience grows and evolves with you. Your values and your beliefs change until you eventually find peace. This is the real success you were looking for in the first place, but couldn't quite put your finger on it.

This entire process is designed as a two-part system. In the first half, you're moving away from what is causing you discomfort or pain, and in the second half, you're entering a new role and then maturing in it. At the very end of this constant iteration, there'll come a moment when you'll not have other desires, and that is when you'll find your peace.

We genuinely hope that this guide will end up in front of the right people and it helps them to shift their existence. This year will be one of personal reconstruction, but nobody asked you to rebuild the same thing as before. Build something new and exciting, aluxers!

This brings us to today's question: if you could reinvent yourself today, what would you like to be or do in this life? We're super excited to hear from you in the comments.

And for those of you who are still watching, as a bonus, we want to issue a challenge: you can reinvent yourself more than once. Here's a crazy concept we've been contemplating for the past several months: what if every 10 years, you decide to do something different with your life in terms of the kind of goals you pursue?

For us, the first decade of our adult life was pursuing financial freedom, and fortunately for us, we've already achieved it. We're doing these videos because it's really fun and exciting to share with you everything we learn from our journey. Also, the money we generate funds other projects that we are super interested in. But what if you decided the next decade to flex your creative muscle and become a professional artist? Create art and do your best for 10 years to see how far you can make it, or become a philosopher, or a writer, or whatever makes your heart skip a beat.

That's the beauty of solving money first; it allows you to pursue everything else afterwards. There's a really smart quote from Nassim Taleb that says, "If you want to become a philosopher king, become a king first, not the other way around."

We thought really deeply about this idea, and we can't wait to see just how much of life we can squeeze into the next 50 or so years we have left. We want to leave you guys with this idea: you should never be scared to reinvent yourself. Do it as many times as you need to until you find a version you're willing to stick with.

Which is why we're going to do something we've never done before. We are issuing a challenge to true aluxers who are watching this video until the very end. If you feel like you're not where you want to be right now, reinvent yourself. Take the "Reinvent Yourself" challenge and walk your way through the steps of this video. Six to twelve months from now, send us an email at contact@alux.com and tell us your story. We would love to feature one or more of you on our channel sometime in the future. It's a great opportunity for us to connect with some of you and for you to dramatically improve your life.

If you're willing to accept this challenge, please write "challenge accepted" in the comment section. We'll go through every comment on this video and look for your names, waiting to see which one of you will reach out via email once they complete the challenge. Until then, we appreciate you, and we couldn't be more proud to share our journey with this amazing community.